Bwah-hah-hah-hah! Testacles makes his triumphant return to the site of his greatest failure. I love it. Beeyooteeful.

Come on Happy Herm,
call on your brothers everybody,
gotta love one another right now.

Well, at least the Jets and Coach Hapless, aka Happy Herm, have their built-in excuse now: Sorry, Woody. We would have beaten the Pats for the division but without the most overrated quarterback in football, we just had no chance whatsoever. Flutie-who? Never heard of him, but I am a big Jay Fiedler fan.

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Nothing worse than afternoon games; I said it before and I will say it again. Wait, I will amend that statement: the only thing worse is an afternoon playoff game. With the second game tonight and without Tivo (sorry, but my tv-related expenses are way too high to begin with) I am stuck waiting for baseball tonight to see highlights (as NESN, God bless the smiling face of Hazel Mae greeting me on NESN every morning rather than some bald dude or jolly fat guy, never shows enough of the game on SportsDesk, as a Sox game should be ten minutes and the Bruins ten minute daily report can be toned down). The NFL, with the NFL Network, have ALL of the games on Sunday available broken down to ten minutes of action. Like manna from the heavens, every Tuesday night I catch up on all the games I missed on Sunday and scout out my next fantasy football finds (say hello to Michael Jenkins and my new back-up QB, Eli Manning).

Of course, while baseball has no such life-affirming option like the NFL Network, it at least gives everyone in the country the right to watch their product without limit if you have the cash. The NFL, it one of the biggest mistakes ever made by the league, limits the Sunday package of games to losers with DirectTV.

Hmm, most people have cable, so we want to be perfectly clear that they cannot pay us money to watch whatever games they want. Those people, we have no desire to obtain their money.

Let me guess, this marketing plan was brought to the NFL by Herm Edwards? It reeks of his intelligence and foresight. OK, that was a cheap shot, but the gripe stands: MLB & NFL, you know the problems you face: Now fix them!

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So the Big Unit vs. the Bloody Sox showdown is off. What a shame. Personally, I like the idea of the two of them in a steel cage, but I think this was the last window for the showdown. This was it for the colossal showdown. Players over forty are always a major risk to stay healthy and effective (see: Bonds, Barry. Everyone who really believed he would not have passed Ruth by now please raise your hand. Nobody? That is what I thought).

Of course, there is still the chance that either team will dramatically cool off and the final three games will be an afterthought: which I fervently hope is not the case. These two teams on the last weekend of the season for all the marbles is a thought too delicious to let go of right now. Major league baseball needs these pennant races right now after the season of the steroids. My fingers are crossed.

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Not for nothing, but if I were Miguel Tejada, Rafael Palmiero would be among the walking wounded. Squealing on the best all-around player in the AL about a B-12 vitamin? I would have kicked his Cubano ass right there if I were Tejada. The Island War would be on!

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