Question: What is a slow news day in Boston?

Answer: March 21, 2007. Why? Because I am subjected to 5,234 articles, stories, WEEIdiots and news broadcasts about Manny Ramirez allegedly selling his grill on eBay. Stop the madness! I do not care if Manny is selling his neighbor’s grill, his neighbor’s dog, locks of his hair, his batting practice hair-net, or the lost last turd of Elvis Presley. Talk about Kason Gabbard and the great spring he has had. Debate about why the Sox should rotate Devern Hansack, Julian Tavarez, and Joel Pineiro in the closing role until one grabs it and runs with it, or simply outlasts the other two (which is EXACTLY what they should do). Alas, it looks like Theo is going to cram Papelbon back to the back of the bullpen yet again.

A-Rod:

Was listening to the Mike & Mike show podcast on the train home the other day with Mike Kurkjian on it (3/21 show I believe). Anyway, Kurkjian is the FIRST analyst I’ve heard to make a case that A-Rod will NOT back out of his contract and run from New York with his tail between his legs. Let me be clear, the choice does not belong to A-Rod. Scott Boras is not going to let A-Rod stay in a contract if there is more guaranteed money potentially on the table. Anaheim, I mean California, I mean Hollywood, I mean Los Angeles by way of Anaheim Angels owner Arte Moreno will dole out $25 million plus a year for five or more years for A-Rod in a heartbeat. That kind of guaranteed moolah is not going to go unclaimed. Sure, A-Rod is a toolbag, but he WILL do as his agent demands because the choice is not going to be his to make.

Pats wide receivers analysis:

Here is where the Patriots weakest position in 2006 stands BEFORE the draft (where they will likely grab another wide receiver in the middle rounds with a compensatory pick):

Donte Stallworth: Finally the Patriots have the speedy receiver they have needed since Branch held-out and punched his ticket out of time. Stallworth should make himself a lot of money this coming season.

Wes Welker: The new Troy Brown. Nuff said!

Reche Caldwell: As the number 3 or 4 guy, he is a perfect fit.

Jabar Gaffney: See Caldwell above.

Kelley Washington: The big guy to catch touchdowns and first downs, take seven.

Chad Jackson: Injured Reserve. Is Chad the new Bethel Johnson? Oh God, I hope not.

Bam Childress: Mr. Everything is back! Play the man!!!

Kelvin Kight: Umm, special teams, maybe?

Jonathan Smith: Practice squad prospect fighting for a spot. Sorry, but nothing more.

Troy Brown: Who? Seriously, I doubt that Brown will be back in New England.

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Premiership wrap-up:

Hooray! Finally got off my arse and listened to the podcasts available at EvertonFC.com. We Blues supporters are still bummed about Tim Cahill being out, but pumped and jacked like we were the most recent coach of the Pats not named Belichick about beating Arsenal (who, admittedly, are not ARSENAL this season). But to pull out the win in bad weather at home in stoppage time (ninety-first minute) on 3/18 against a team like was HUGE. Andy Johnson banged home his twelfth goal in thirty Premiership games this season for the winner for the surprise three points. With Man U and Chelsea slugging it out at 1-2, Everton is fighting for a top five spot, and with the three points they are only 1 point behind Bolton for fifth place and 8 points behind Liverpool. Fourth would get them to the Champions Cup; fifth or sixth will let them into UEFA cup. The win jumped them over Tottenham (who continued to surge, winning three straight matches) and Reading, where they SHOULD stay with only ten matches left.

Checking in on my brothers-from-other-mothers playing for Charlton (Darren & Marcus Bent), they are four points from saving the season and getting out of the relegation station with West Ham and Watford. With Sheffield United only four points ahead and Wigan and Man City (with a game in hand) only six points ahead, Charlton has a chance to escape. Also, as the bottom bottles up, I would be neglect to not mention that Fulham and Aston Villa are only seven points from relegation. But West Ham has been, well, stinking out the joint lately and all signs point to their free-fall continuing. The best thing for Charlton is that my brother-from-another-mother Darren Bent is back from injury and looking to be back to the form he displayed two years ago when he replaced Wayne Rooney at Everton and was scoring goals all over the pitch.

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